What Is a Growth Mindset? (And How to Actually Develop One)

Quick Summary: Struggling to stick with anything? A growth mindset helps you stop believing you’re “just not that kind of person” and start proving you can change. Here’s how to shift from fixed to growth thinking in everyday life.

You start strong. New habit a new goal and a new version of you. Three days in, maybe a week, and then… nothing. You quit. Again.

And that voice gets louder: “See? You’re just not disciplined. You’re not the kind of person who follows through.”

Here’s the problem: you’ve decided who you are. And that decision is keeping you stuck.

But there’s a different way – one that turns “I can’t” into “I can’t yet.” It’s called a growth mindset.

What Is a Growth Mindset?

A growth mindset is the belief that your abilities and habits can be developed through effort and practice.

It’s the opposite of a fixed mindset – the belief that you’re born with certain traits and can’t change them.

Fixed mindset says: “I’m just not a morning person.” “I’m not good at exercise.” “I’ve never been disciplined.”

Growth mindset says: “I haven’t figured out mornings yet.” “I’m still learning what movement works for me.” “I’m building discipline one choice at a time.”

“Becoming is better than being.” – Carol Dweck

That shift from permanent labels to temporary states opens the door to possibility.

Fixed Mindset vs Growth Mindset: Why It Matters

When you operate from a fixed mindset, every setback feels like proof. You quit the gym? Of course – you’re not athletic. You broke the habit streak? Obviously cause you’re not disciplined.

Each failure reinforces the identity you’ve built. And that identity becomes a cage.

“The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

When you operate from a growth mindset, setbacks become feedback. You quit the gym? The routine didn’t match your energy. You broke the streak? You haven’t found the right system yet.

What this looks like:

Fixed mindset avoids challenges because failure would expose limitations. Growth mindset seeks challenges because that’s where learning happens. (As the Stoics understood, obstacles become the way forward when you work with them.)

Fixed mindset gives up when things get hard. Growth mindset adjusts the approach.

The difference isn’t talent. It’s how you interpret what happens.

Pause & Reflect: Take 30 seconds right now. Think about the last thing you quit or gave up on. What did you tell yourself? “I’m not good at this” (fixed) or “I haven’t figured this out yet” (growth)? No judgment – just notice.

How to Develop a Growth Mindset (The Practical Way)

Here’s the framework for shifting from fixed to growth thinking:

Step 1: Catch the fixed mindset language

Start noticing when you use permanent labels. “I’m not a runner.” “I’m terrible with money.” “I’ve never been organized.”

These statements feel true because you’ve believed them for years. But they’re not facts – they’re stories you’ve been telling yourself.

Step 2: Add “yet” to the end

This is the simplest, most powerful reframe: “I’m not a runner… yet.” “I’ve never been organized… yet.”

That one word opens possibility. It reminds you that who you are today isn’t who you have to be tomorrow.

Step 3: Focus on process, not outcome

Growth mindset values effort and learning over perfect results.

Instead of: “I want to run 5k” → Try: “I’m building a running practice” Instead of: “I need to lose 20 pounds” → Try: “I’m learning what helps my body feel strong”

The process is where growth happens.

Step 4: Reframe failure as feedback

When something doesn’t work, ask: “What did this teach me? What would I do differently?”

Each “failure” is just information about what doesn’t work for you yet. And each time you show up, even imperfectly, you’re proving to yourself that change is possible. (This reframing approach is central to Amor Fati, the Stoic practice of turning obstacles into growth.)

Growth Mindset Examples: What This Looks Like Daily

Fixed: “I missed my workout – I’m useless, why do I even try?” Growth: “I missed today, but I can show up tomorrow. What got in the way?”

Fixed: “Everyone else seems to have their life together except me.” Growth: “They’ve figured out systems that work for them. I can learn and build my own.”

Fixed: “I’ve tried to change before and it never works.” Growth: “I’ve learned what doesn’t work for me. Now I can try something different.”

The shift isn’t dramatic. It’s subtle. But these small reframes compound into genuine belief that you can change.

The Growth Mindset Trap to Avoid

Growth mindset is NOT positivity that ignores real limitations.

Some things are genuinely harder for some people. That’s real. But “harder” doesn’t mean “impossible.” It might just mean you need a different approach, more support, or more time.

Growth mindset isn’t about being able to do anything. It’s about refusing to believe you can’t do anything. As Carol Dweck herself clarifies, growth mindset isn’t just about effort – it’s about trying new strategies and seeking input when you’re stuck.

Final Thought

You’ve spent years believing “I’m not disciplined” or “I’m not that kind of person.”

But here’s the truth: you’re not any fixed kind of person. You’re whoever you’re becoming through the choices you make today.

That habit you keep quitting? You’re not failing because you’re flawed. You’re learning what doesn’t work so you can find what does.

Growth mindset isn’t about believing you’ll succeed at everything. It’s about believing you can learn from anything.

3 Everyday Mastery Steps You Can Take Now

1. Catch yourself using fixed mindset language today. Notice “I’m not” or “I can’t” statements. Awareness is the first step.
2. Add “yet” to one limiting belief. Pick your biggest “I’m just not that kind of person” statement and add “yet.” Say it out loud.
3. Reframe one recent “failure” as feedback. Write: “What did this teach me? What will I try differently?”

For more on building resilience when growth feels lonely, read: How to Handle the Loneliness of Personal Growth Using Stoic Resilience

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This is your permission slip to start messy. We don’t chase perfect here – we practice progress, because that’s Everyday Mastery.

Disclaimer: I’m a coach, not a clinician. What I share comes from real practice and personal growth, not therapy. If you’re finding things hard, it’s okay to get professional support – it makes a difference.

Kel

Kel is the writer behind Everyday Mastery, where she shares the real, messy, and meaningful process of building habits, resilience, and self-belief from the ground up. Her writing blends ancient philosophy with modern science, always focused on small, practical steps that lead to lasting